I love Wednesdays. They begin at the Newington Day Centre. I spend the morning serving the elderly tea and toast as they filter in. Taxis bring them and come in waves so there are large stretches of down time. I love it. The down time yields opportunity to get to know the different women who come to the centre. There are men who come to the centre as well but I don’t interact with them nearly as much; I am kind of unofficially designated to the women’s room. Only one man ever really ventures in to sit and talk. He is a one of a kind, outgoing, brave soul. Each morning I make my way around the room with my cup of tea in hand trying to make sure I talk to everyone. Inevitably though, I have developed some favorites I talk to more then others and the more outgoing ones who stop me from going by get more of my attention. I have my little routine with all of them. One I joke with about her need to always get “fresh air” before lunch which is actually her wee smoke break, another always jokes about filing complaints and getting me sacked but always laughs and smiles after. They all ask me when I’m going home, if they can keep me, and marry me off to their nephews and grandsons. They are all in different stages of age, some suffering from extreme dementia, others quite physically handicapped and others still who are still very physically capable and are mentally all there. They love that I am from KY and one woman prides herself in her clever nickname for me to call me her “Wee Kentucky Fried Chicken”. She’s scared my parents will be offended by the nickname when they come to visit. Once everyone has arrived we bring them all into the kitchen/dining area and serve them lunch. It didn’t take me long to learn the special ways each of them like their food and they love that I remember the quirks like smaller portions or no milk in their tea but instead just a wee drop of cold water. After serving lunch, dessert, and tea I help take the members to the given activity for the afternoon. The activity varies from art to music to film. Each day I clean up for lunch and sit down with the other staff and volunteers to eat lunch. I eat lunch quite quickly and leave before most are done so I can get to WAVE quickly.
I arrive at WAVE as the men are eating and finishing their lunches. Often I’ll grab a plate for my second lunch and my 4th-5th cup of tea that day. The men’s group sits and banters with each other all through lunch. Recently I’ve grown to realize they have begun slegging me more often (northern Irish slang for being the butt of the joke). I like to take this to mean they like me and are comfortable with me. One of the men brings me a bag of “treats” each week. This bag usually consists of cheese and onion crisps, chocolates, and sometimes instant coffee. Our cabinet is full of these because he brings more then Zoe and I can ever eat. I’ve tried to decline this bag a few times but am never successful. In the beginning, I didn’t know what was going on because his accent is so thick I couldn’t understand a single word he said. Now I realize he’s just too stubborn to not bring me the bag and too nice to ever forget. I will inevitably never be able to reject the bag and will be swimming in cheese and onion crisps by the end of the year.
About half an hour after I arrive the men’s group activity begins. This ranges from a group discussion activity to a few weeks of them learning how to paint. They really got into the painting and of course made competitions of who’s painting of a beachy/water scene was best. Currently the new project is working to make a large group piece of stained glass and smaller individual glass mosaic projects. I make the tea in the middle of the group for my 7th-8th cup of tea in the day for break in the middle. Granted most of them have already walked in and out about 3 times in order to go out and smoke. Most people at WAVE smoke so activity revolves around the smoke breaks. I often go and stand with them while they smoke (up wind) because it’s a nice time to talk to them and get to know them.
Like Newington, the men’s group have found a very fond place in my heart. Wednesdays are days when I really feel I am in groups that have embraced me, love me, and where I belong. The people on Wednesday look out for me, make sure I’m doing ok, and appreciate me being there for them. They trust me and have shown me things about Northern Ireland I feel I never would have understood or been able to comprehend before. Wednesdays are a lot of what being a YAV is all about, especially since soon Fortwilliam’s youth fellowship might be added to the day. Hopefully with no more tea because drinking more then 10 cups in one day is a bit extreme, don’t you think?
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